in the first year of uni i hated doing these blogs as we were basicly forced to write about what we were told well thats what i though but now i love writing them because we have so much range and freedom, i still felt ill wen i was writing my first one but now i feel fine. im glad we do not have to do essays (thank you mike one big thumbs up) i hated essays thats one of the reasons i loved being artistic, back in school i hated every lesson except tech (which was graphics) and art, everything else seemed a waste of time to me except maths that was fun because i was reasonably good at it, infact it was my best grade(A) we had these 2 brainy kids in my year both of which were in my art class and did graphics aswell, which put alot of pressure on everyone in the class to do better and thats part of the reason iam here ive always loved drawing and after beating them in gsce art grades it was settled i would go do some form of college art course, then everything led from there went to college got the best grades possibel 3 destinctions but it was all down to my life drawing that got me in but it was due to my grades in school and college that gave me the confidence and the knowlege to want to learn more.

if found something very weird about me rescently, ive slowly de-learnt to spell over the years, its not because im getting more stupid its because im getting more lazy, i found most of the problems is to do with msn, writing fast is important as you writing as if you were speaking and we all know theres not that many people out there that can type fast, on the spelling side of things i just miss spelt "writing" i spelt it with a "gh" that word is so simple yet i forgot without even knowing it and to spell it right would of been alot faster, i may even be dislexic. Before college and uni i didnt know much of dislexia because i never really encounted many people who have it but after going through college and especialy uni i have realised most artistic people are dislexic for example my tutor alot of my friends are and i think having this problem is not nessecerily a bad thing it makes you strive to do better artisticly because the more academic things are alot harder to express yourself in. ive found i can explain things faster through drawing rather than speach this is evident in alot of people i know, how many times have you been wanting to explain something but wish you had a pen and paper but dont and as a result just give up trying.

rituals

due to this holiday i have finally realised the imporntance of surroundings in work, being comfortable not being distracted even the position of my drawing board to my computer, i now spend a good 15 minutes setting up to do work i even find myself positioning my work so it can be seen from my door so as to make people look at it and give me advice on it, for drawing i always need my computer next to me at about 45 degrees to my drawing bpard and below my drawing board i need my pencils and water colours in easy reach this is to speed up work flow, as everything is in arms reach then i always spend about 10 minutes looking at my last drawing to see were i want to gofrom there. so all this even before i pick up a pencil. i wonder if anyone else has similar types of rituals they go through before work?

to be honest i dont want to be writing this post i should be in bed asleep due to being ill also my sleeping patterns are so messed up i get up at 6pm n go to bed at 6 am i havnt seen light in 3 days. all these problems are making it so hard to get work done, don't get me wrong ive done some but no where near as much as i should have by now its been 3 - 4 days of no work cuz i dnt have the strength to get up i dnt even have strength to eat but im going to try my best with the time i have got left on this holiday no matter how hard it is to get up. to be honest getting up out of bed is hard for me normally and getting to the point of actually doing work is even harder.. iam so inundated with work it is hard to see this day as a holiday, my brothers in scotland so im also alone, im used 2 having constant critacism but because he is nto here the only person that can crit my work is me and no matter what people say about learning to self crit you never do it accuratly, for example if you have an idea in your head and you draw it you fill in the gaps with your mind to make the drawing work like there is supposed to be pattern on the dress but you know what its going to look like but an outsider looking in wouldnt kniw that and the whole drawing would lose meaning. thats enough of a rant i think.